17 hashers showed up at the Bank of Guam to run All of the Above’s second haring and last run on Saipan.  Included in this rabble was visiting hasher Rude Boy, returning hashers Phlegm Phatale, Crapper Don, Kali (Nepalese Security Guard), FNG’s Mark McKibbin and Denise (friend of Dawn).  The box was announced as the driveway of the BOG so the Tyrant hollered for everyone to get in it.  The hares gave special instructions (flour) and then took off.  During the 10-minute head start, the Tyrant ‘splained the instructions to the tow FNG’s.  Once the time was up, the pack took off East out of the parking lot straight up Broadway and into Chinatown.  The trail continued up the hill towards Morgen’s Bluff, where the trail turned to the right towards the Sugar King Motel.  A checking here took the pack up into the bowels of upper Chinatown, past the Hyatt Barracks, and then into the Kanat Falipe (otherwise known as the Chinatown Gulley). The trail was slicker than cat shit and wound it’s way up over mossy rocks, and under downed trees.  FNG Denise was overcome by the oppressive heat at the cable waterfall, but after some rest was able to continue (with some coaxing from the Tyrant).  The trail continued up the gulley until it came to Fanaganan Lichan and former Governor Larry Guerrero’s abandoned farm.  Out on to the Chalan Galaide road we popped, and then headed over towards Kannat Tadun Rapugao.  At the Navy Hill “Y” we checked up towards the ball field and the lighthouse.  But the trail went past Ciega’s old House, and Rajneesh and Cecil B/Fruit Loops, Space Case, Rangers old house, and then down past the Marianas Hotel.  The trail continued down the backside of Navy Hill or As Rapugao, until a checking took us into the jungle above ANAKS.  We followed the poorly marked trail through the trees and then popped out on the ANAKS driveway.  Down to Chalan Pale Arnold, and an arrow pointing towards Smiling Cove.  We followed the pathway, and on on’s to the Boating Safety building and then on out to the Channel Marker at the end of the pier.  Turns out that the hares got caught and All of the Above would have lost her shorts, but then again, if looks could kill, Dog Leg would be dead.

The stragglers eventually showed up, and the vehicle run took all of 5 minutes.  Balls of Steel slaved over a hot hibachi and came up with some excellent Polska Kilbasa, all greasy and hot, and some very unusual potato salad.  After everyone had eaten so much they could hardly breathe, the Tyrant piped up Religion.  The hares came forward, and Messaiah told us how good it should have been.  All of the Above talked about how good it would have been.  (And we all agreed it would have been cool to see her pink panties).  We then called on the FNG’s to come forward and did not get to see tits. Next visiting hasher Rude Boy got up and told us about the Interhash and RA Emeritus Dick Chair and his antics in Goa.  He also presented the Tyrant and Dog Leg with commemorative Interhash T-shirts.  Next Crapper Don gave us the blow by blow of the fire in the hole.  Then we got people to come up and give us tales from the trail.  A few attempts at jokes were tried, and although they were classics, everyone had heard them already and delivery is everything.

Next Dick Scrotum was called forward to do his Shoe Down Down since he is going back to the real world.  He then tossed his shoes on the fire and they BLAZED!  Next All of the Above was called forward (but refused because she was sure someone was going to pull down her panties).  After this, the Tyrant called for policing the area, and then Swing Low was sung.  Everyone talked about going to Hamilton’s for free food, the Tyrant of course went home.

HASHING AROUND THE WORLD
THE YEAR & 2003 & 2004
Africa InterHash 2003! Diani Beach, Kenya, from May 1st to 4th. The Registration Fee is $115 until October 7th ($30 for under 17's). On top of the Registration Fee you'll pay $43 per night for all-inclusive accommodation. That's all the Tusker and goat you can stuff down yourself for 3 straight days! www.africainterhash2003.com

THE NEXT POSSIBLE WORLD INTERHASH http://www.hasher.net/ih2004.htm

MISMANAGEMENT
TYRANT/GM:      HAJ. F, KRAMDEN, SIR
RA:                         DOG LEG
AAAARA:             HAJ CLAYMORE
FIRE MASTER: OLY
D.L.MMMM TECHNICIAN: DOG LEG
HASH CASH:      CIEGA
TRAIL MASTER: DOG LEG
HASH SCRIBE:  BORSCHT CINTURON
The Saipan Hash House Harriers convenes every Saturday at 4:00 p.m. (3:30 during “winter”) at the Bank of Guam parking lot in Garapan.
U.S.$10.00 (NON NEGOTIABLE)

RECEDING HARELINE
941         11/30    Beerhead
942         12/07    Ladrone
943         12/14    Haj Floorshow
944         12/21    Haj Fucking Kramden, Sir! &  Claymore
945          12/28       Bob SaggetBob Sagget & Haj Floorshow
946          1/04/03    Dog Leg
IF YOU WANT TO SIGN UP TO BE A HARE, CONTACT CIEGA.  IT IS A HASHERS DUTY TO BE A HARE.  BE SOMEBODY, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS.  GOD BLESS AMERICA.  GOD BLESS THE SAIPAN HASH HOUSE HARRIERS.

Editorial

Once again I have been hoodwinked into hosting a party in my home, on a Saturday night.  I don’t know what my wife was thinking.  Anyway, I am really sorry to miss Saint Peter’s first haring in a long time, but now he will know what it feels like to show up at the BOG and not see some of his favorite people.

WE MEET AT 3:30 P.M. (until MARCH, 2003)
HASH BULLETIN BOARD
18th Annual Turkey Trot, 6:00 am on Thursday, 11/28, 2002 Thanksgiving Day, at Public Works Party Beach, up to Mt. Toputchau.  See you there.
CONTACT TYRANT AT WOLF@SAIPAN.COM OR 236-2540.
WANT TO SURF THE HASH NET.  TRY WWW.HALF-MIND.COM OR WWW.GTHHH.COM
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR WELCOME.  PLEASE SEND TO WOLF@SAIPAN.COM TO GET ON THE SH3 MESSAGE LIST, VISIT
WWW.HUFFYPUFFY.COM  ALSO, MAKE SURE YOU GO TO HUFFYPUFFY.COM AND SIGN ON TO THE NEW LISTBOT AT YAHOO.

22 hounds gathered at the Bank of Guam on this HOT Saturday afternoon for a run that everyone knew could not help but be better than last week’s Banker’s Circle Jerk.  Of course, nearly anything could have topped that run.  Among those present were returning X-terriers Fartacus, Speckled Pecker, and Jordass.  Amazingly, the FNG from the Banker’s run also returned with two more FNGs from the PIC (NWATPIC!).  We also witnessed the return of Captain George, who brought another FNG (2nd Mate David), and Haj Fucking Kramden, Sir!! who had intentionally scheduled another social event the week before to get out of the Banker’s Run.  The Box was announced and a fair attempt at carpooling was made.  Because Dogleg still has not repaired his truck, Hulkus Maximus was forced to use the highly unreliable Slut-mobile as the beer truck.  Despite having been “repaired” for three weeks, the truck became severely overheated and almost did not make it to the Box.  Because of the danger of breakdown, the coolers were transferred into Mike Petersen’s truck, although not before Dogleg was able to squeeze crucial information from Hulkus that the drive to the on-home was all downhill.  Aha!

Just as everyone was being forced inside the old ammunition bunker, which now has more recent, less erudite graffiti covering the old Oppenheimer quote, a pack of piglets ran over from the farm across the road and attacked the hare’s flour bags.  All was nearly lost until the pigs were chased off by Buster Brown’s Dog.  The hares gave the special instructions: a detailed eye symbol and “ribbons of all colors”, which gave away the rest of the trail (can you say Laderan Tangke?) and then were off.  They didn’t even try to fool the pack with a checking – they just took off running down the hill.  Kramden ‘splained the instructions to the FNGs, while the rest of us wandered around, played with the Dog, or just pissed in the bushes.  The piglets never came back.

As expected, the trail led down the pavement to a checking at the entrance to the Laderan Tangke nature trail.  FRB Fartacus asked Dog Leg if they should turn right (into the trail) or if it might be a trick.  Dog Leg replied that “nah – those two aren’t sophisticated enough to take us anywhere else but right”.  And he was correct!.  But what he didn’t know was that the hares were hiding in the weeds and had heard every word he had said, and were grievously insulted.  If the shoe fits…

The trail ran right past the nature trailhead and down the boonie road to the other end.  A checking here did not really fool anyone, and the pack checked straight down into the trail towards Bird Island.  The only (mild) surprise here was that he hares did not run down to the overlook, but instead took us all the way around the far end of the nature trail, and back up to the trailhead again – a circle jerk.  Although not a bad one, I will admit (especially compared to the previous week’s).  Toward the end of the circle, the hares laid an arrow in the trail and then no further flour for a couple hundred yards – an attempt to dissuade flyers at the start of the trail, but which also ended up confusing the RRB’s later on, some of whom thought they were off trail and ended up dicking around for a little too long.

From here it was a fairly long pavement-pounder down past the As Matuis homestead, right at the Million Gallon water tank, and then onto the boonie road that goes around the front of the golf course to the maintenance buildings.  The trail then followed the paved road down to the pool and then the dirt road to Wing Beach.  When Dog Leg and Fartacus came in, the hares made a point of standing in the water and calling attention to their “sophisticated” Samuel Adams beer.  They eventually had to explain how they had hidden in the grass and had been insulted by the FRB’s conversation, but they were good sports and shared the extra beer.  Lots of people were partying and camping on Wing Beach that night (including Splat and Cotton Twat), and as the pack came in, we watched one group chain-sawing trees for their bonfire (which they later set on fire with about a gallon of gasoline).  Of course, we weren’t doing anything about our own fire because Firemaster OLY was not there!  By the time the vehicle run returned with the pallets it was nearly dark, and the task was handed to former Firemaster Dog Leg, who was able to get a feeble little blaze started with some twigs, lots of paper, and lots of blowing (and plenty of advice from the FNGs – maybe we can assign an assistant Firemaster?)  The hares began handing out some very tasty homemade burritos about this time, and the start of religion was delayed for a few minutes while everyone ate.  This delay allowed the Clubmate FNGs to escape, because they claimed they had to go back to work.  NWAPIC!  Beers were finally brought up to the beerboard, and the hares were called forward.  Hulkus Maximus did not have much to say, but Cracker Jack told the “sophisticated” story again, and how manly-man Hulkus took on all the work and would not let her do anything (carry flour, set trail, etc.) but cook in the kitchen where she belongs!  For this, Hulkus Maximus was re-named “Maxchismo”.  Dog Leg then indicted himself for forgetting to write the Trash for the previous week’s Banker’s Circle Jerk, but no one really cared.  Fartacus and Jordass gave trip reports, and a few tales from the trail, courtesies, and jokes were told.  The Tyrant attempted to retire the vessel several times, but was prevented by a few who did not want religion to end.  Unfortunately, the rest of the crowd did not come up to say or do anything, so the vessel ultimately had to be retired.  The area was policed, Swing Low was sung, and the crowd dispersed.  Because of the excellent burritos, Hamilton’s was unnecessary for some of us, so I have no idea where anyone headed from there.

The Saipan Hash House Harriers convenes every Saturday at 4:00 p.m. (3:30 during "winter") at the Bank of Guam parking lot in Garapan    U.S. $10.00 (NON NEGOTIABLE)

MISMANAGEMENT
TYRANT/GM                          Haj, F. Kramden, Sir!!
RA:                                          Dog Leg
AAAARA:                               OPEN
FIRE MASTER                      Olie
HASH CASH                         Ciega
TRAIL MASTER                    Dog Leg?
DLMM TECHNICIAN            Dog Leg
HASH SCRIBE                     You know….

REMEMBER, IF YOU GO BACK TO THE REAL WORLD AND THERE IS NO HASH, START ONE.  IT IS A GREAT WAY TO MEET PEOPLE, AND SOME ONE IS BOUND TO SHOW YOU THEIR TITS ONE OF THESE DAYS.

RECEDING HARE LINE...
FM79  11/20   MHP (Wednesday)
940      11/23   Saint Peter & ?
941      11/30   Beerhead & Floorshow
942      12/7     Ladrone & Floorshow
943      12/14   Floorshow & Floorshow
944      12/21   Messiah & Floorshow
945      12/28   Bob Saggett & Floorshow
946      1/4       Dog Leg & Floorshow
947      1/11     OPEN (& Floorshow)

CONTACT CIEGA TO SIGN UP.  IT IS A HASHER’S DUTY TO BE A HARE.
BE A HARE, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS

EDITORIAL

FREE BEER!!!!!
FREE FOOD!!!!
AT HAMILTON’S!!
TONIGHT!

Someone named Jim or Bob or something Ripple is getting married and is having their reception at Hamilton’s tonight.  Rick asked me to tell the Hash that we are all welcome as usual, the only difference is that we will have to park down below, and everything is FREE!

The recent lack of activity on the Listbot may be one factor in explaining why 18 hounds were stupid enough to show up for this year’s Annual “Banker’s Circle Jerk” run.  Among those who knew better and stayed away were Haj Fucking Kramden, Sir!! who had “conveniently” scheduled a dinner with his “Pastor” at the same time.  Yeah Right!  Those who did come were either so depraved and committed to the Hash that they didn’t care (Dogleg, Ciega), too long gone and disconnected to have known today was the Banker’s run (Abbott, Octopuss’s Bitch, and Lemur), or simply too new to know any better.  We even had one FNG (Derrick from the PIC) who was unfortunate enough to choose this as his first run.  At the BOG, Claymore brought out some pretty cool Banker’s Run shirts but was only able to sell two of them, probably because he was asking $15 for them, when the price tags (in Pesos) clearly showed that he had paid about 50 cents a piece for them.  In the absence of Dog Leg’s truck, Hulkus Maximus was forced to ante up his brand-new company truck as the beer truck.

Once at the Box, the hounds were brought up to the second floor as usual, but were unable to enter the storage room and were instead placed in the hallway directly adjacent to where the Box normally is.  Special instructions included possible shredded paper on-ons and Bank of Saipan checkings, neither of which were actually seen on trail.  With that the hares were off, and were easily observed by Beerhead (in the women’s bathroom) setting the first checking behind the building.  Dog Leg ‘splained the instructions to the lone FNG, who apparently was made to come by Red Squirrel and Red Sasquatch.  Dog Leg and MHP passed the time by breaking the Box and scouting out the emergency exits, which had been overlooked in previous Banker’s runs.

Once the 10 minutes were up, the pack quickly ran out to the rear of the building to the first checking on Texas Road, where despite the spying of Beerhead, everyone ran in the wrong directions.  MHP, Dogleg, and a few others ran off behind a garment factory fence, where they startled a Chinese man (who according to MHP uttered the Mandarin equivalent of “what the fuck?”) but found no on-ons.  The main pack ran off to the right, into the bowels of CK, where Hulkus Maximus and a few others continued all the way down to Chalan Tun Joaquin Doi for no apparent good reason, and then continued to run in circles through the neighborhood.  Ciega was the only one who checked correctly and headed north into the boonie path that connects the southern and northern parts of Texas Road.  Eventually the FRBs caught up, and ran true trail past Oleai Elementary School and out to the Middle Road intersection, where an arrow led us across and on-ons were found heading north along the shoulder.  The pack was forced by heavy traffic to run in the weeds, mud, and flowing pig shit along the shoulders of road past Coca-Cola, McDonalds, and Nagoya Star up to the intersection at Quartermaster Road, where the trail checked left and down to Beach Road.  At the traffic light, Dawn was asked by everyone, repeatedly, to push the button for the crosswalk, prompting Ciega to want to name her “Push my Buttons”, but she left before religion anyway and was spared the lame name (leaving us free to name her something more hash-like, for instance “Cock Ring” or “Shit Licker”, two names that I am eagerly awaiting to give out as soon as appropriate).

Trail continued along the Beach Road Pathway, hot and hard, past an auto accident allegedly caused by beertruck driver Balls of Steel, and all the way to Oleai Beach Bar and Grill, where we were taken onto the beach for a grueling run in the sand all the way down to the Grand Hotel.  Nearly everyone missed the exit from the beach, which was marked with a hidden on-on at the back of an ironwood tree near a jet ski concession.  Some hashers, including MHP and Ciega, ended up running all the way to Sugar Dock before figuring out they were off trail.  It didn’t really matter anyway.  True trail left the beach as mentioned and ran back out across Beach Road, behind Joeten, and back to the Nauru Building parking lot, where Claymore had set up the on-home in the grass by the Bank of Hawaii.  As the hounds slowly straggled in, the hares heated up chili and barbecued hamburgers for the third dinner Hash in a row.  Oly found a piece of roofing tin to set the fire on top of, and began taking apart pallets just like Pinoccular.  Also just like Pinoccular, he did not start the fire until it was already dark.  In this case, right next to the ATM and dozens of passing garment workers and bank customers, we didn’t mind so much.  Fortunately, Claymore had obtained permission from the Nauru Building’s owner (the President of Nauru?) to burn his grass down.  With no need for a vehicle run, Dog Leg was able to get religion started in fairly short order, with Claymore as RA.  Claymore and the Marlboro Man came up and talked about the run, and how the pregnant and bitchy Balls of Steel had allegedly caused a traffic accident due to her poor use of the stick shift.  Derek the FNG came up and received numerous apologies for the run, in the hopes that he would actually return for a second chance to see what the SH3 could really be like.  Several people came up to bitch about the run and tell tales from the trail, and Ciega even gave Claymore a courtesy for setting the first “urban dickhead” run in many months.  A few acknowledged that yes, these kinds of runs are occasionally necessary add variety to the mix, but that hardly anyone actually enjoys them.  A few jokes were told, but in truth no one was very comfortable standing around in front of a blazing campfire in the parking lot of the Bank of Hawaii, so the vessel was retired without much ado.  The area was policed (except for the burnt grass and fire debris, which there wasn’t much we could do about) and a half-hearted and self-conscious round of Swing Low was sung, and everyone departed to go their separate ways.

The Saipan Hash House Harriers convenes every Saturday at 4:00 p.m. (3:30 during "winter") at the Bank of Guam parking lot in Garapan    U.S. $10.00 (NON NEGOTIABLE)

MISMANAGEMENT
TYRANT/GM                          Haj, F. Kramden, Sir!!
RA:                                          Dog Leg
AAAARA:                               OPEN
FIRE MASTER                      Olie
HASH CASH                         Ciega
TRAIL MASTER                    Dog Leg?
DLMM TECHNICIAN            Dog Leg
HASH SCRIBE                     Thomas Aldan

REMEMBER, IF YOU GO BACK TO THE REAL WORLD AND THERE IS NO HASH, START ONE.  IT IS A GREAT WAY TO MEET PEOPLE, AND SOME ONE IS BOUND TO SHOW YOU THEIR TITS ONE OF THESE DAYS.

RECEDING HARE LINE...
FM79  11/20   MHP (Wednesday)
940      11/23   Saint Peter & ?
941      11/30   Beerhead & Floorshow
942      12/7     Ladrone & Floorshow
943      12/14   Floorshow & Floorshow
944      12/21   Messiah & Floorshow
945      12/28   Bob Saggett & Floorshow
946      1/4       Dog Leg & Floorshow
947      1/11     OPEN (& Floorshow)
CONTACT CIEGA TO SIGN UP.  IT IS A HASHER’S DUTY TO BE A HARE.
BE A HARE, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS

EDITORIAL

If nothing else, an Urban Dickhead run always gives a good cross section of the current state of affairs and quality of life on Saipan.  In this case, 2002 is not looking any better than 2000 or 2001.  The false trail behind the garment factory revealed that nothing has changed there since we ran behind it two years ago on the Banker’s run – they are still draining their kitchen sinks and cooking grease into the wetland, and throwing their trash over the fence.  The shoulders of Middle Road are still littered and muddy, but now there’s the new addition of flowing pig waste from the farm just south of McDonald’s.  On the other hand, there is perhaps a little less trash on the beach, and the Beach Road pathway still looks pretty good.

It may piss you off to see all the trash on the beaches here, and there is certainly a sector of society (both local and foreign) who obviously don’t give a damn.  But over the past several years, there has been a slight but perceptible change in littering, at least among island residents.  Part of this is due to the many organizations that now conduct volunteer clean ups of the beaches.  I used to notify the Hash about the DEQ-sponsored “Beach Brigade” clean ups (the original volunteer group), but I quit for a while when Hashers stopped attending.  However, I have received interest again from some of you to participate, so I will start posting the location and date of the clean ups on the Listbot.  Clean-ups are usually scheduled for 8:00 a.m. on the first Saturday of the month.  Please keep an eye out for these notices, and come out at least once to try it out.  The trash you pick up may piss you off, but believe it or not, it really does make a difference.

15 hashers showed up at the Bank of Guam (to be joined later by Dog Leg).  This was the annual Halloween Run.  Triple X, (aka Vin Diesel, aka Wino Kerosene,) aka Triple H, aka Haj Fucking Kramden, Sir!, was there in costume, as were National Office supply fairies John and Dawn, and Buster Brown (Jerry Clooney the great white dope), and purple haze hares Max and MHP.  Pam Brown was dressed up as some high falootin dance hall girl or bag lady. Ciega had a HALLWAY SEX hat on as her costume. The box was announced and MHP said that the trail would be the same as the Full Moon Run (NOT NOT NOT).  At the box, the beer truck drove up and Kramden asked Max if he wanted a receipt for the ice.  “Ice?”  The heavy conversation that Salt Pieter and Max were having made them forget to buy ice.  In the box, the hares gave special instructions (white flour and white ribbon), and then were off.  The Tyrant ‘splained the instructions to the FNG, Jim Blackburn who his sister-in-law Pam Brown made come, and a little old lady named Ann.  After the 10-minute head start, the pack was off down to the road and a checking which split the pack in two.  Salt Pieter (who had been on the Full Moon run) checked down hill thinking that the hares did not lie. The rest of the pack went up the dirt road that leads to the road behind the golf course.  The pack split up here again, with some going behind the golf course and the rest going to the Suicide Cliff Road.  The true trail went up the hill.  The pack re-grouped and headed up to the top, where they met some Korean tourists who thought we were going to leap off of the cliff.  But the trail actually went into the Banadero Trail.  From here it was basically down hill all the way.  The trail followed the trail, with just a few side steps off of the main trail.  When we got to the place where the rope was supposed to be, it was broken by Al Hermann, (never trust a man with 2 first names).  Lucky he has a hard head and was not hurt.  At the bottom of the hill, the trail veered back up a little ways (where the hares got confused), but then headed down into the parking lot of the Korean Memorial.  From here it was a straight run out towards the dump, (Engineer Buster Brown says that this is a might fine hole, and he should know being married to PLF) past the dump, and then down to Cowtown Beach. Since the road has been completely trashed in the last few rains, the coolers had to be hand carried down to the bottom of the hill. After everyone was in, a fire was started.  Then a vehicle run was done, and the little old lady left.  Once everyone came back, and MHP brought the Beer Butt Chicken and Huge pot of chili, everyone engorged himself or herself.  Once everyone was full and farting, the Tyrant piped up Religion.  The hares were called forward and gave each other great honor and lied about how much work they had done on the trail.  Next the lone FNG was called forward and did not shame himself.  Kowpaddy gave us a no hash trip report.  Then courtesies were done and jokes were told.  Dog Leg told us about his brush with the TV lady (OPEN YOUR TV RIGHT NOW!), as he screamed like a girl and drove off leaving her by herself in the middle of the road.  Pam Brown was summoned to be given the hash name Bag Hag (her costume) and we named Al Betty. It was a beautiful night, but everyone could hardly breath from all the food they had eaten.  Hulkus Maximus even collapsed near the feet of the RA and could not get up. Some more jokes were told, and then the Tyrant called for policing the area.  Swing Low was sung, and everyone grabbed something and headed up the rutted road to the top of the hill where the cars were.  Most people headed to Hamilton’s, but the Tyrant of course, went home.

HASHING AROUND THE WORLD THE YEAR & 2003 & 2004
Africa InterHash 2003! Diani Beach, Kenya, from May 1st to 4th. The Registration Fee is $115 until October 7th ($30 for under 17's). On top of the Registration Fee you'll pay $43 per night for all-inclusive accommodation. That's all the Tusker and goat you can stuff down yourself for 3 straight days!
THE NEXT POSSIBLE WORLD INTERHASH http://www.hasher.net/ih2004.htm

MISMANAGEMENT
TYRANT/GM:      HAJ. F, KRAMDEN, SIR
RA:                         DOG LEG
AAAARA:             HAJ CLAYMORE
FIRE MASTER: OLY
D.L.MMMM TECHNICIAN: DOG LEG
HASH CASH:      CIEGA
TRAIL MASTER: DOG LEG
HASH SCRIBE:  BORSCHT CINTURON
The Saipan Hash House Harriers convenes every Saturday at 4:00 p.m. (3:30 during “winter”) at the Bank of Guam parking lot in Garapan.   U.S.$10.00 (NON NEGOTIABLE)

RECEDING HARELINE
938        11/09    Cracker Jack
939        11/16    OPEN
940        11/23    St. Peter (does he know?)
941        11/30    Beerhead
IF YOU WANT TO SIGN UP TO BE A HARE, CONTACT CIEGA.  IT IS A HASHERS DUTY TO BE A HARE.  BE SOMEBODY, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS.

Editorial
I am probably not with you guys today, because believe it or not, I do have a life outside the hash.
Aside from being the Tyrant, I am a founding member of the Saipan Sports Fisherman’s Association, founding member of T.A.G.A., Inc, and a member of the Saipan Community Church and School Board.  It is pastor appreciation month, and we are hosting a little dinner for the pastor and his wife.  Before you make light of the fact that I would be involved in some other sect or denomination (other than Religion at the hash), remember that I do believe in something greater than myself.  I do believe that someone or some thing helped me to recover from the obsession to drink alcohol.  You believe what you want, and I will believe what I want.  I am very liberal when it comes to beliefs.  And once in a while, once in a great while, I need to miss the Hash on Saturdays.  Of the 935 runs that have already happened since 1984, I have been on at least 850.  So I although I will miss being with you tonight, I will not miss the hash, because I will be there in spirit.

CONTACT TYRANT AT WOLF@SAIPAN.COM OR 236-2540.
WANT TO SURF THE HASH NET.  TRY
WWW.HALF-MIND.COM OR WWW.GTHHH.COM
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR WELCOME.  PLEASE SEND TO WOLF@SAIPAN.COM TO GET ON THE SH3 MESSAGE LIST, VISIT
WWW.HUFFYPUFFY.COM  ALSO, MAKE SURE YOU GO TO HUFFYPUFFY.COM AND SIGN ON TO THE NEW LISTBOT AT YAHOO.

22 hounds, including the long missing Body Snatcher and All of the Above showed up at the Bank Of Guam to run a trail set by the newly pregnant Balls of Steel and her hubby Doug.  We also welcomed Dawn and John, who Happy Pockets made come.  The box was announced and the assembled headed way out to Kagman.  At the Community center, Ciega and Happy Pockets parked in the Policemen’s parking space and had to move when they drove up (the first time a policeman has been there in 6 months).  The hares gave special instructions (flour and pink ribbon) and then Doug was off (his co-hare {which means fuck in Spanish}) having driven off minutes before.  The first part of the run was just a long and grueling pavement pounder around the outskirts of Kagman 4.  The trail looped around to the quarry road and then checked into the Forbidden Island access road.  Now it was a long uphill trail on loose, gravelly road.  Soon however, the trail went into the jungle on the right and then began a slow descent into a creek bed, which was still damp from weeks of rainy run-off.  The trail eventually dropped into the creek bed over some well-marked barbed wire, and then started down at an even steeper decline.  The trail followed the creek down, over slippery rocks, mud, and even some stagnant pools of water.  Soon however, the trail went right up a hill and out on to a hillside that hugged the cliff line overlooking the ocean shelf just west of Forbidden Island.  At one point, hares heading west, heard just above them, hares heading east and called out to see if it was faster to just short cut through the pine forest.  However, FRB Dog Leg told those behind, to follow the trail, explaining later that it was because he did not want us to miss the cool view. CRAP!!  To some people hashing is a race.  Anyway, those of us in the middle of the pack continued on trail until it looped back and started heading east again.  Eventually we got to a point where there was an arrow pointing down into the ravine we had just come from.  At the bottom of the slope were Buster Brown and Haj Claymore, resting and waiting for PLF.  The rest of the pack dropped down into the ravine and started the slow, hard, slog, back up the creek bed.  Eventually we came back out on the access road and checked toward the overlook.  Unfortunately this was not the way the trail went.  We went back out to the main road, and then looped the other way around Kagman 4, and all the mean and vicious, loose dogs who live in the village (including PRINCESS who although normally tied up on her second storey, laid in wait for Dog Leg and tried to make him Dog Legless!)  Eventually the trail led to the Tank Beach road and down to the beach.  A vehicle run was done, pallets were collected, a fire was started, and the Tyrant piped up Religion.  The hares were called forward and we all admired Balls of Steels Swollen Mammary Glands, and congratulated Doug on a job well done.  Next the FNG’s were called forward (he is a pharmacist, she a nurse), and they did not embarrass themselves.  Next we called Jacquie forward, and for climbing in a tree during last weeks Religion and remaining there the whole time, she was christened, Cheshire Pussy (she is a gynecologist).  We also gave Doug the Hash Name Marlboro Man for being such a heavy smoker, even when trying to set the trail.

Since Balls of Steel had thrown down the bad joke gauntlet, many got up to tell the fuckiest, suckiest jokes, and I have to put in my vote for Mr. Happy Pockets and the No Bell Piece Prize and the Pullet Surprise.  They were real groaners.  Huge cardboard boxes from MHP’s Federal move to Saipan were burned on the fire as well and there was much rejoicing.  Eventually, the Tyrant got tired and needed to sit down, and soon the vessel was retired, the area policed, Swing Low sung, and everyone headed back to civilization and Hamilton’s.  The Tyrant of course went home.

HASHING AROUND THE WORLD THE YEAR 2002 & 2003 & 2004
Africa InterHash 2003! Diani Beach, Kenya, from May 1st to 4th. The Registration Fee is $115 until October 7th ($30 for under 17's). On top of the Registration Fee you'll pay $43 per night for all-inclusive accommodation. That's all the Tusker and goat you can stuff down yourself for 3 straight days! www.africainterhash2003.com
 THE NEXT POSSIBLE WORLD INTERHASH
http://www.hasher.net/ih2004.htm

MISMANAGEMENT
TYRANT/GM:      HAJ. F, KRAMDEN, SIR
RA:                         DOG LEG
AAAARA:             HAJ CLAYMORE
FIRE MASTER: OLY
D.L.MMMM TECHNICIAN: DOG LEG
HASH CASH:      CIEGA
TRAIL MASTER: DOG LEG
HASH SCRIBE:  GREAT B.O. FIRE
The Saipan Hash House Harriers convenes every Saturday at 4:00 p.m. (3:30 during “winter”) at the Bank of Guam parking lot in Garapan.

U.S.$10.00 (NON NEGOTIABLE)
RECEDING HARELINE
937        11/02    Claymore (Banker's Circle Jerk)
938        11/09    Cracker Jack
939        11/16    OPEN
940        11/23    St. Peter (does he know?)
941        11/30    Beerhead

IF YOU WANT TO SIGN UP TO BE A HARE, CONTACT CIEGA.  IT IS A HASHERS DUTY TO BE A HARE.  BE SOMEBODY, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS.

Editorial

Life has become so uncertain.  The government here continues to travel to Hell in a Hand basket, in complete ignorant bliss and denial over the fact that it is quickly running out of money.  We stand at the brink of another war with Iraq, the North Koreans admit that they really are part of the axis of evil by building nuclear weapons capabilities.  Innocent people are being shot dead in the center of the United States base of power, and the Jews and Arabs continue to destroy each other through attrition.  And although death and taxes are the only two things that are certain in this life, rebates are only a maybe.  But there is one other thing that is certain on Saipan.  Come rain or shine, hell or high water, typhoon, or drought, on Saturday afternoon between 3:30 and 4:00 p.m., someone will be there to set the trail for you good people. Be that someone.  Sign up to be on the receding hare line.

CONTACT CIEGA.  IT IS A HASHERS DUTY TO BE A HARE.  BE SOMEBODY, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS.
GOD BLESS AMERICA.  GOD BLESS THE SAIPAN HASH HOUSE HARRIERS.
WE MEET AT 3:30 P.M. (until MARCH, 2002)
HASH BULLETIN BOARD
CONTACT TYRANT AT WOLF@SAIPAN.COM OR 236-2540.
WANT TO SURF THE HASH NET.  TRY WWW.HALF-MIND.COM OR WWW.GTHHH.COM
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR WELCOME.  PLEASE SEND TO WOLF@SAIPAN.COM TO GET ON THE SH3 MESSAGE LIST, VISIT
WWW.HUFFYPUFFY.COM ALSO, MAKE SURE YOU GO TO HUFFYPUFFY.COM AND SIGN ON TO THE NEW LISTBOT AT YAHOO.

22 hounds, (including 3 underage FNG’s in training) and one guy named Al who Beerhead made come.  Minnie Pearl (after having had weeks to plan) pulled boxes out of a hat (he even cheated when he pulled out Last Command Post and said it was Mt. Toputchau) and told everyone where the box was. Fags Ciega and Beerhead made the ultimate sacrifice and drove the beer truck.  Everyone headed up to the top, and got the great view, but the box was down in the parking lot.  The hares gave special instructions; flour only, and then took off.  Jordass cheated and went up and saw the hares check south at the circle road, then came and told us all.  After the Tyrant ‘splained the instructions to the FNG and the 10-minute head start was over, everyone headed down the hill.  Since we already knew where the hares went, we all checked south and headed around the mountain.  This was part of the Saipan Xterra bike trail.  This trail went for about ½ mile, through a couple of farms, until it checked at the Old Japanese Road. Here the trail checked right (or north) and we all figured it was a circle jerk. We followed the trail on this road, past the betelnut plantation owned by Mr. Reyes and then back up the hill towards the main Toputchau Road.  However, about 15 yards before the road, we hit a checking which took the pack into the jungle.  This thick trail paralleled the road for a while, but then turned down into an abandoned farm, and then towards the Frank Camacho Turkey farm.  We came out of the jungle on the Upper Navy Hill Road and were greeted by a couple of Camacho Kids who eagerly pointed us in the right (west) direction and asked if there were anymore people behind us.  The trail then continued down the road until we got to former Governor Guerrero’s abandoned weekend retreat.  We found water bottles on the trail and took a long drink.  The trail then continued into the farm and then into the beautiful lush bamboo grove at the top of the Chinatown Gulley.  It was here that the Tyrant took his one and only spill, followed closely by Salt Pieter, (who went another way to avoid just such a spill).
From here it was right into the ravine (which has changed much since the last time I was in it and I would imagine quite a bit since the Xterra as well).  This of course because of the torrential rains we have been having the past few weeks.  There was much slipping and sliding, and climbing and crawling. There were a couple of really big drops here, which were difficult during daylight, so I can just imagine how Claymore and the Bickersons felt going through here in the dark. Eventually the trail popped out above the Chinatown Hotel and then it was a straight run to Middle Road, down past the Horiguchi Builiding, and then over to the beach.  Of course, once again, doing it in the daylight was much easier, because after dark, Rick from the ship was not able to find trail when he came out of the jungle.  He asked around and found out that the BOG was close and went there and waited for the mercy truck.  Once most people were in and it got dark, the Tyrant called for a mercy truck.  A vehicle run was done and the search began for the stragglers.  Ciega left her phone behind (but apparently, the signal at the tower on the mountain was no good {CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?}) but several times, the Tyrant answered the phone and there was no one there.  Eventually, Minnie Pearl found the last three people, drove past BOG and picked up Rick and returned to the On Home.  A small fire was started, the pallets thrown on, and Religion piped to order. The hares were called forward and blew great smoke up each other’s butts about how great they were.  The FNG was called forward next and explained how he asked Eric, when they hit the Chinatown Gulley Trail head, “Are we REALLY GOING IN THERE?”  Next, courtesies were offered to the run.  This was followed by many tales from the trail and discourtesies by the Bickersons (BB and PLF) to the hares and to each other.  Some attempts at jokes were made, but everyone was REALLY tired from this run.  Eventually the Tyrant retired the vessel and called for policing the area. Swing Low was sung, and the assembled headed to Hamilton’s.  The Tyrant of course went home.

HASHING AROUND THE WORLD
THE YEAR 2002 & 2003 & 2004
Africa InterHash 2003! Diani Beach, Kenya, from May 1st to 4th. The Registration Fee is $115 until October 7th ($30 for under 17's). On top of the Registration Fee you'll pay $43 per night for all-inclusive accommodation. That's all the Tusker and goat you can stuff down yourself for 3 straight days! www.africainterhash2003.com
 

THE NEXT POSSIBLE WORLD INTERHASH
http://www.hasher.net/ih2004.htm
BUT MAKE SURE YOU WEAR YOUR BODY ARMOR

MISMANAGEMENT
TYRANT/GM:  HAJ. F, KRAMDEN, SIR
RA:   DOG LEG
AAAARA:  HAJ CLAYMORE
FIRE MASTER: OLY
D.L.MMMM TECHNICIAN: DOG LEG
HASH CASH:  CIEGA
TRAIL MASTER:HAJJI PEEWEE
HASH SCRIBE:  FRANKLIN TENOR

The Saipan Hash House Harriers convenes every Saturday at 4:00 p.m. (3:30 during “winter”) at the Bank of Guam parking lot in Garapan.
U.S.$10.00 (NON NEGOTIABLE)

RECEDING HARELINE
FM78 10/21 OPEN MONDAY FULL MOON
936 10/26 MAN HALLOWEEN
937 11/2 HAJ CLAMORE
938 11/9 CRACKER JACK
IF YOU WANT TO SIGN UP TO BE A HARE, CONTACT CIEGA.  IT IS A HASHERS DUTY TO BE A HARE.  BE SOMEBODY, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS.

Editorial
Being a tourist is getting to be harder and harder.  What a tragedy in Bali this past week. I am saddened by the loss of life and hope that no one here was directly affected by this murderous act.  I have to believe that if everyone in the world belonged to a hash, crap like this would not be happening.  No one should take ANYTHING (except hashing) as serious as some of these guys take their religious/political beliefs. Imagine sitting at Hamilton’s one evening and having the whole place erupt in flame and explosion and trying to identify the charred bodies of your drinking buddies.  That really sucks.
But really folks, life is a gift, and if we waste it by sitting around worrying about this happening to us, we have wasted one of the most precious things known to man and beast alike.  Do not live your life in fear.  When it is your time, it is your time, and there is nothing you can do to stop it.  So enjoy the ride.

WE MEET AT 3:30 P.M. (until MARCH, 2003)
HASH BULLETIN BOARD
CONTACT TYRANT AT WOLF@SAIPAN.COM OR 236-2540.
WANT TO SURF THE HASH NET.  TRY WWW.HALF-MIND.COM OR WWW.GTHHH.COM
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR WELCOME.  PLEASE SEND TO WOLF@SAIPAN.COM TO GET ON THE SH3 MESSAGE LIST, VISIT
WWW.HUFFYPUFFY.COM :: ALSO, MAKE SURE YOU GO TO HUFFYPUFFY.COM AND SIGN ON TO THE NEW LISTBOT AT YAHOO.

HASHING AROUND THE WORLD
THE YEAR 2002 & 2003 & 2004
Africa InterHash 2003! Diani Beach, Kenya, from May 1st to 4th. The Registration Fee is $115 until October 7th ($30 for under 17's). On top of the Registration Fee you'll pay $43 per night for all-inclusive accommodation. That's all the Tusker and goat you can stuff down yourself for 3 straight days! www.africainterhash2003.com
THE NEXT POSSIBLE WORLD INTERHASH
http://www.hasher.net/ih2004.htm

MISMANAGEMENT
TYRANT/GM:  HAJ. F, KRAMDEN, SIR
RA:   DOG LEG
AAAARA:  HAJ CLAYMORE
FIRE MASTER: OLY
D.L.MMMM TECHNICIAN: DOG LEG
HASH CASH:  CIEGA
TRAIL MASTER:HAJJI PEEWEE
HASH SCRIBE:  FRANKLIN TENOR
The Saipan Hash House Harriers convenes every Saturday at 4:00 p.m. (3:30 during “winter”) at the Bank of Guam parking lot in Garapan.
U.S.$10.00 (NON NEGOTIABLE)

RECEDING HARELINE
935 10/19 BALLS OF STEEL
FM78 10/21 OPEN MONDAY FULL MOON
936 10/26 M&M MAN HALLOWEEN
937 11/2 CRACKER JACK
IF YOU WANT TO SIGN UP TO BE A HARE, CONTACT CIEGA.  IT IS A HASHERS DUTY TO BE A HARE.  BE SOMEBODY, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS.  GOD BLESS AMERICA.  GOD BLESS THE SAIPAN HASH HOUSE HARRIERS.

Editorial
Although the run was not the best one I have ever been on, it was not the worst.  It was great to see Mr. Happy Pockets again.  It is always good to see someone who goes back to the real world, but realizes there really is only one place to be, on a Saturday afternoon. I was also happy to see the return of Ciega because being hash cash is really a lot of hard work.
The two tourists will be talking about this past weekend for years to come.  And they may even start hashing in Japan.  Although I am sure it will be a big disappointment after the Saipan Hash.

WE MEET AT 4:00 P.M. (until SEPTEMBER 28, 2002) HASH BULLETIN BOARD
CONTACT TYRANT AT WOLF@SAIPAN.COM OR 236-2540..
WANT TO SURF THE HASH NET.  TRY WWW.HALF-MIND.COM OR WWW.GTHHH.COM
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR WELCOME.  PLEASE SEND TO WOLF@SAIPAN.COM TO GET ON THE SH3 MESSAGE LIST, VISIT
WWW.HUFFYPUFFY.COM ALSO, MAKE SURE YOU GO TO HUFFYPUFFY.COM AND SIGN ON TO THE NEW LISTBOT AT YAHOO.

22 hounds, (including 3 underage FNG’s in training) and one guy named Al who Beerhead made come.  Minnie Pearl (after having had weeks to plan) pulled boxes out of a hat (he even cheated when he pulled out Last Command Post and said it was Mt. Toputchau) and told everyone where the box was. Fags Ciega and Beerhead made the ultimate sacrifice and drove the beer truck.  Everyone headed up to the top, and got the great view, but the box was down in the parking lot.  The hares gave special instructions; flour only, and then took off.  Jordass cheated and went up and saw the hares check south at the circle road, then came and told us all.  After the Tyrant ‘splained the instructions to the FNG and the 10-minute head start was over, everyone headed down the hill.  Since we already knew where the hares went, we all checked south and headed around the mountain.  This was part of the Saipan Xterra bike trail.  This trail went for about ½ mile, through a couple of farms, until it checked at the Old Japanese Road. Here the trail checked right (or north) and we all figured it was a circle jerk. We followed the trail on this road, past the betelnut plantation owned by Mr. Reyes and then back up the hill towards the main Toputchau Road.  However, about 15 yards before the road, we hit a checking which took the pack into the jungle.  This thick trail paralleled the road for a while, but then turned down into an abandoned farm, and then towards the Frank Camacho Turkey farm.  We came out of the jungle on the Upper Navy Hill Road and were greeted by a couple of Camacho Kids who eagerly pointed us in the right (west) direction and asked if there were anymore people behind us.  The trail then continued down the road until we got to former Governor Guerrero’s abandoned weekend retreat.  We found water bottles on the trail and took a long drink.  The trail then continued into the farm and then into the beautiful lush bamboo grove at the top of the Chinatown Gulley.  It was here that the Tyrant took his one and only spill, followed closely by Salt Pieter, (who went another way to avoid just such a spill).
From here it was right into the ravine (which has changed much since the last time I was in it and I would imagine quite a bit since the Xterra as well).  This of course because of the torrential rains we have been having the past few weeks.  There was much slipping and sliding, and climbing and crawling. There were a couple of really big drops here, which were difficult during daylight, so I can just imagine how Claymore and the Bickersons felt going through here in the dark. Eventually the trail popped out above the Chinatown Hotel and then it was a straight run to Middle Road, down past the Horiguchi Builiding, and then over to the beach.  Of course, once again, doing it in the daylight was much easier, because after dark, Rick from the ship was not able to find trail when he came out of the jungle.  He asked around and found out that the BOG was close and went there and waited for the mercy truck.  Once most people were in and it got dark, the Tyrant called for a mercy truck.  A vehicle run was done and the search began for the stragglers.  Ciega left her phone behind (but apparently, the signal at the tower on the mountain was no good {CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?}) but several times, the Tyrant answered the phone and there was no one there.  Eventually, Minnie Pearl found the last three people, drove past BOG and picked up Rick and returned to the On Home.  A small fire was started, the pallets thrown on, and Religion piped to order. The hares were called forward and blew great smoke up each other’s butts about how great they were.  The FNG was called forward next and explained how he asked Eric, when they hit the Chinatown Gulley Trail head, “Are we REALLY GOING IN THERE?”  Next, courtesies were offered to the run.  This was followed by many tales from the trail and discourtesies by the Bickersons (BB and PLF) to the hares and to each other.  Some attempts at jokes were made, but everyone was REALLY tired from this run.  Eventually the Tyrant retired the vessel and called for policing the area. Swing Low was sung, and the assembled headed to Hamilton’s.  The Tyrant of course went home.

HASHING AROUND THE WORLD
THE YEAR 2002 & 2003 & 2004
Africa InterHash 2003! Diani Beach, Kenya, from May 1st to 4th. The Registration Fee is $115 until October 7th ($30 for under 17's). On top of the Registration Fee you'll pay $43 per night for all-inclusive accommodation. That's all the Tusker and goat you can stuff down yourself for 3 straight days! www.africainterhash2003.com
THE NEXT POSSIBLE WORLD INTERHASH
http://www.hasher.net/ih2004.htm
BUT MAKE SURE YOU WEAR YOUR BODY ARMOR

MISMANAGEMENT
TYRANT/GM:  HAJ. F, KRAMDEN, SIR
RA:   DOG LEG
AAAARA:  HAJ CLAYMORE
FIRE MASTER: OLY
D.L.MMMM TECHNICIAN: DOG LEG
HASH CASH:  CIEGA
TRAIL MASTER:HAJJI PEEWEE
HASH SCRIBE:  FRANKLIN TENOR
The Saipan Hash House Harriers convenes every Saturday at 4:00 p.m. (3:30 during “winter”) at the Bank of Guam parking lot in Garapan.
U.S.$10.00 (NON NEGOTIABLE)

RECEDING HARELINE
FM78 10/21 OPEN MONDAY FULL MOON
936 10/26 MAN HALLOWEEN
937 11/2 HAJ CLAMORE
938 11/9 CRACKER JACK
IF YOU WANT TO SIGN UP TO BE A HARE, CONTACT CIEGA.  IT IS A HASHERS DUTY TO BE A HARE.  BE SOMEBODY, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS.  GOD BLESS AMERICA.  GOD BLESS THE SAIPAN HASH HOUSE HARRIERS.

Editorial
Being a tourist is getting to be harder and harder.  What a tragedy in Bali this past week. I am saddened by the loss of life and hope that no one here was directly affected by this murderous act.  I have to believe that if everyone in the world belonged to a hash, crap like this would not be happening.  No one should take ANYTHING (except hashing) as serious as some of these guys take their religious/political beliefs. Imagine sitting at Hamilton’s one evening and having the whole place erupt in flame and explosion and trying to identify the charred bodies of your drinking buddies.  That really sucks.
But really folks, life is a gift, and if we waste it by sitting around worrying about this happening to us, we have wasted one of the most precious things known to man and beast alike.  Do not live your life in fear.  When it is your time, it is your time, and there is nothing you can do to stop it.  So enjoy the ride.

WE MEET AT 3:30 P.M. (until MARCH, 2003)
HASH BULLETIN BOARD
CONTACT TYRANT AT WOLF@SAIPAN.COM OR 236-2540.
WANT TO SURF THE HASH NET.  TRY
WWW.HALF-MIND.COM OR WWW.GTHHH.COM
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR WELCOME.  PLEASE SEND TO WOLF@SAIPAN.COM TO GET ON THE SH3 MESSAGE LIST, VISIT
WWW.HUFFYPUFFY.COM
ALSO, MAKE SURE YOU GO TO HUFFYPUFFY.COM AND SIGN ON TO THE NEW LISTBOT AT YAHOO.

15 hounds showed up for the joint Saturday/Full Moon Run, under a dark, and foreboding sky.  There were no FNG’s, and Cotton Twat made it 2 in a row.  Beerhead, (still hobbled but here) returned after a long convalescence from foot surgery.  Firemaster Oly also returned from a Health Spa Hash in Australia. Ong Ong (Shay) also returned with a treat for everyone. The box was announced as the Last Command Post.  Once everyone went to the parking lots (Last Command Post/Korean Memorial), the hares said that the box was inside the Last Command Post.  Since the Eastern tunnel entrance was flooded, we went around the back and climbed over the little rock wall and into the bunker.  The hares gave special instructions (white ribbon and white flour) and then took off.  No one paid any attention to which way the hares went, although we did see taillights headed out to Banzai Cliff.  Anyway, we wiled away the time talking bullshit and business until the time was up.  Then it was out the back of the bunker and down to the main road.  The pack was all over the place until someone found an On On heading west.  The trail went behind the Korean Memorial and then right on to the Banadero Trail.  From here, it was a pretty cut and dried run, up the trail, up the rope, up the stairs, on to the top flat part, where Ladrone went to “see” the view (in the dark no less) and this is where he became separated from Haj Claymore.  Eventually the trail popped out on the Suicide Cliff overlook and then down the road to the Mariana Country Club access road.  It was here that the Security Cows were strewn across the road scaring Phlegm Phatale and others. The trail continued for about ¾ of a mile until we hit an arrow heading into the golf course.  We crossed a ditch and then followed on on’s all the way across the fairways to the club house, then down the road to the pool, and then an arrow to Wing Beach.  As we arrived, the Tyrant got the group organized and the coolers down on the beach.  Snacks were eaten, beers and soft drinks drunk, but all was not ok because Haj Claymore and Ladrone were still out.  The hares went looking for them but were unable to locate either of them. Eventually Claymore showed up and told about the lookout (into nothingness point).  Another vehicle run was done and this time Ladrone was found, and summarily berated and brow beaten by Buster Brown.   Since it was a full moon, Tyrant Kramden joined the hecklers and let Dog Leg and W.E.B. be in charge. The hares were called forward and BB once again berated Ladrone.  Buster Borwn also whined about the black thorns that WEB warned him about.  These are the kind that you have to use pliers to remove from the inside of your shoes.  There is a huge patch of these thorns right behind the Korean Memorial.  Oly gave us his trip report and talked about the Coff’s Harbor Hash House Harriers who “RAN” in a health club (they got it free for the whole night) the night that he was there.  How sucky is that? Courtesies were done, and soon the moon cakes (in honor of the Chinese Moon Festival) came out (as did the moon from behind a cloud). More courtesies were done and everyone was required to come up and do a down down. Jokes were told, more courtesies, and eventually the vessel was retired.  The area was policed, Swing Low sung, and everyone headed home (except those who stayed behind to enjoy the night).  The Tyrant of course went home.

HASHING AROUND THE WORLD THE YEAR 2002 & 2003 & 2004
Africa InterHash 2003! Diani Beach, Kenya, from May 1st to 4th. The Registration Fee is $115 until October 7th ($30 for under 17's). On top of the Registration Fee you'll pay $43 per night for all-inclusive accommodation. That's all the Tusker and goat you can stuff down yourself for 3 straight days! www.africainterhash2003.com
THE NEXT POSSIBLE WORLD INTERHASH
http://www.hasher.net/ih2004.htm

MISMANAGEMENT
TYRANT/GM:   HAJ. F, KRAMDEN, SIR
RA:                       DOG LEG
AAAARA:            HAJ CLAYMORE
FIRE MASTER: OLY
D.L.MMMM TECHNICIAN: DOG LEG
HASH CASH:     CIEGA
TRAIL MASTER:HAJJI PEEWEE
HASH SCRIBE:  ANGLEO PEPPERONI
The Saipan Hash House Harriers convenes every Saturday at 4:00 p.m. (3:30 during “winter”) at the Bank of Guam parking lot in Garapan.
U.S.$10.00 (NON NEGOTIABLE)

RECEDING HARELINE
933             10/5            PISSBREAK
934             10/12         MINNIE PEARL
935             10/19         BALLS OF STEEL
FM78         10/21         OPEN MONDAY FULL MOON
936             10/26         M&M MAN HALLOWEEN
937             11/2            CRACKER JACK
IF YOU WANT TO SIGN UP TO BE A HARE, CONTACT CIEGA.  IT IS A HASHERS DUTY TO BE A HARE.  BE SOMEBODY, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS.

Editorial

It certainly was a special night on Saturday.  It really is true that it never rains on the Saipan Hash. Or it least it rarely does.  And I can count on one hand the times that the trail was completely washed away by rain. It was nice to see Beerhead back, even if we did not see her tits.  It was good to see Oly back and re-enforce what most people will tell you.  There is no hash like the Saipan hash.  Consider yourselves blessed.

CONTACT CIEGA.  IT IS A HASHERS DUTY TO BE A HARE.  BE SOMEBODY, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS.
GOD BLESS AMERICA.  GOD BLESS THE SAIPAN HASH HOUSE HARRIERS.
HASH BULLETIN BOARD
CONTACT TYRANT AT WOLF@SAIPAN.COM OR 236-2540..
WANT TO SURF THE HASH NET.  TRY WWW.HALF-MIND.COM OR WWW.GTHHH.COM
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR WELCOME.  PLEASE SEND TO WOLF@SAIPAN.COM TO GET ON THE SH3 MESSAGE LIST, VISIT
WWW.HUFFYPUFFY.COM ALSO, MAKE SURE YOU GO TO HUFFYPUFFY.COM AND SIGN ON TO THE NEW LISTBOT AT YAHOO.

19 hounds showed up at the Bank Of Guam including a whole bevy of minor FNG’s.  We will say no more about that!

However there were several complaints about the new (since last week) $10 fee, including one from the hardly ever seen Cotton Twat.  So the box was announced, the group headed up to Capitol Hill, and was herded into a little waiting room outside the land registrar’s office. The hares gave special instructions (pink ribbon and flour).  Then they were off and it began to rain (only a light mist, but it would not stop).  The hares left and the Tyrant ‘splained the instructions to the FNG’s.  Once the time was up, the pack was off in all directions.  Some went up the Topuchau road, some east.  True trail was east.  The trail continued down the hill to Rajneesh and Cecil B Street to a checking.  The Tyrant checked left, the rest of the pack right towards the Capitol Hill quarry.  This was true trail and an arrow took the pack up a driveway and then on to the spine of the mountain.  The trail took us into some lush jungle and then the rain began in earnest.  It was so odd to run under leaves, which acted as spouts for the water.  We did not get wet from the rain, but from the water being trapped in the leaves and then being funneled down on our heads.  Obviously it was slicker than cat shit, and anyone wearing gloves was just carrying extra weight half way through.  Oddly enough, though, most of the flour stayed on trail, and this would not bode well for the hares.  Because of the rain, Red Sasquatch went back on trail to add flour where they thought it would be washed away (it was not).  Red Squirrel parked the beer truck and headed up to the on home.  Red Sasquatch stumbled out of the jungle and found the beer truck parked in the middle of the road.  He searched everywhere for the keys. He searched in the bed, in the seat, in the glove compartment, under the seat, above the dashboard.  He searched everywhere except the ignition which is where the keys were!   So he was standing there when FRB’s Wet Dream and Tupperbutt came out of the jungle.  Seeing as how he is bigger than they are, he kept his shorts.  Eventually everyone made it up to the On Home, which was also going to be the venue of the 30th birthday party of Red Squirrel.  It is amazing what $10 will buy.  There was Carona, San Miquel, carrot sticks and dip, Lumpia, barbecued short ribs, and smoked sausage. (Courtesy of our hosts, but the Tyrant was justifying the increase in Hash Costs).  There was much eating and drinking, and then a vehicle run was done.  In the absence of the fire master, AAAARA  Haj Claymore built a fire and then everyone was called to come down to Religion. Real hashers came down, but most of the wankers and erzats hashers stayed up on the patio eating and drinking.  The Tyrant called the hares forward and wondered why they were still wearing their shorts. (See EXPLANATION ABOVE).  As the hares were preparing, someone brought down a birthday cake with a red squirrel on it and we all sang happy birthday.  During this time, one of the MPS ships lights went off and it suddenly sailed away (BOMB BOMB BOMB, BOMB BOMB IRAQ!!!)  Next the Tyrant called for courtesies, and there were many.  Then he called for tales from the trail, and there were even some of these.  Then he called for jokes, and there were even some attempts at humor and some of them were funny (old, but CLASSICS!).  Buster Brown indicted Fely and Norma for hashing in Tagalog and wanted them to come up and tell jokes in Tagalog. Haj Claymore got up several times to show off his hair shirt.  The Tyrant called for backsliders and Cotton Twat led the pack.  PLF also got up and did her backslider down down. The Tyrant kept throwing the abundant cardboard on the fire and eventually smoked Salt Pieter off of his rock. The area was policed, Swing Low was sung, more food was eaten, and then everyone split up in many directions to go God knows where.  The Tyrant of course went home.

HASHING AROUND THE WORLD THE YEAR 2002 & 2003 & 2004
Africa InterHash 2003! Diani Beach, Kenya, from May 1st to 4th. The Registration Fee is $115 until October 7th ($30 for under 17's). On top of the Registration Fee you'll pay $43 per night for all-inclusive accommodation. That's all the Tusker and goat you can stuff down yourself for 3 straight days! www.africainterhash2003.com
THE NEXT POSSIBLE WORLD INTERHASH
http://www.hasher.net/ih2004.htm

MISMANAGEMENT
TYRANT/GM:      HAJ. F, KRAMDEN, SIR
RA:                         DOG LEG
AAAARA:             HAJ CLAYMORE
FIRE MASTER: OLY
D.L.MMMM TECHNICIAN: DOG LEG
HASH CASH:      CIEGA
TRAIL MASTER:HAJJI PEEWEE
HASH SCRIBE:  ANGLEO PEPPERONI
The Saipan Hash House Harriers convenes every Saturday at 4:00 p.m. (3:30 during “winter”) at the Bank of Guam parking lot in Garapan. U.S.$10.00 (NON NEGOTIABLE)

RECEDING HARELINE
932          9/28         HAJJI PEE WEE
933          10/5         PISSBREAK
934          10/12       MINNIE PEARL
935          10/19       BALLS OF STEEL
FM78       10/21       OPEN MONDAY FULL MOON
936          10/26       M&M MAN HALLOWEEN
937          11/2         CRACKER JACK
IF YOU WANT TO SIGN UP TO BE A HARE, CONTACT CIEGA.  IT IS A HASHERS DUTY TO BE A HARE.  BE SOMEBODY, SET TRAIL FOR YOUR FRIENDS.

Editorial

Although it will be a cold day in Hell before you see Corona and San Miquel on the hash, the party did help to stretch the meager hash budget another week.  When you think about what you get for $10, it is amazing.  Consider that at one time, Korean tourists would pay $95 per person, to ride in the back of a pick up, go on pre-set (by Fish and Wildlife) trails, and then eat snacks.  With no entertainment!  Consider that today, you can go to Forbidden Island, with lunch, and all you have to pay is $35 (they provide WATER).  For your $10, you get A) to see parts of Saipan most people will never see; B) All the beer and soft drinks you can drink (while supplies last); C) Live entertainment in the form of the Kramden and Dog Leg Show, D) Great Hash Snacks like Fruit & Nut Medley, boy M&M’s, chips, and pistachios. You also get to hang out with some really cool people, and once in a while you get to see TITS! (Or Blow Job dangling ding dong and flabby ass).  Isn’t THAT worth $10??

GOD BLESS AMERICA.  GOD BLESS THE SAIPAN HASH HOUSE HARRIERS.
WE MEET AT 4:00 P.M. (until SEPTEMBER 28, 2002)
HASH BULLETIN BOARD
CONTACT TYRANT AT WOLF@SAIPAN.COM OR 236-2540..
WANT TO SURF THE HASH NET.  TRY WWW.HALF-MIND.COM OR WWW.GTHHH.COM
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR WELCOME.  PLEASE SEND TO WOLF@SAIPAN.COM TO GET ON THE SH3 MESSAGE LIST, VISIT
WWW.HUFFYPUFFY.COM
ALSO, MAKE SURE YOU GO TO HUFFYPUFFY.COM AND SIGN ON TO THE NEW LISTBOT AT YAHOO.